Sunday, June 26, 2011

Am I a Terrible Parent? Tales of the Tooth Fairy

You can see where a couple of the missing "moldars" are here.  :)
Jan 28
My daughter seems to be losing all her teeth at once. She lost two of her molars within two days of each other, and a third one was loose. The Tooth Fairy was late for the first tooth, so Willow put the tooth with the second one in a plastic zippy bag under her pillow. A few days later, the Tooth Fairy managed to catch up enough on her route to pick up the teeth and deposit some money in the bag.

As I’ve explained to Willow, the Tooth Fairy is an incredibly busy fairy, since there are sooo many kids in Portland who are all losing their teeth, probably at the same time as she is, so she just needs to be patient, the Tooth Fairy won’t forget her. So far, she never has. (I say she or he, but Willow insists the Tooth Fairy is a girl fairy, despite the fact that her grampa is a dental hygienist who insists the Tooth Fairy is a boy.)

Anyhow, Willow left a message for the Tooth Fairy when she left the two teeth. It read something like this: “Dear Tooth Fairy, My dad says that I should only eat soft food because I have another loose moldar and hard food could make it come out. Is he right?”  [She said "moldar."  Cute, innit?]  She didn’t believe her dad, so she had to appeal to the higher power.  Who better than the Tooth Fairy to know about  loose teeth?

So I, er, ahem, the Tooth Fairy left this for a response: “Dear Willow, Your daddy is probably right. Softer food will be less likely to make your tooth come out. Stay away from sticky chewy foods like taffy because they can pull your tooth out and you could swallow it.” Willow was ecstatic she received a response.

Cut to when she finally lost that moldar. The Tooth Fairy was characteristically late, because she was broke. Er, I mean, behind on her rounds. Anyhow, when the Tooth Fairy finally made it to Willow’s pillow, she couldn’t FIND the dang tooth because the room was such a mess. So the Tooth Fairy left the following note:

“Dear Willow. I stopped by to pick up your tooth, but I couldn’t find it because your room is so messy. I will try again another time. It is probably best you keep your room clean so that I can give you your reward for your tooth, when you can find it. Love, The Tooth Fairy.”

The tooth still hasn’t been found. Willow is, of course, disappointed.

Today, Willow had another tooth come out. I asked her tonight if she put the tooth under her pillow. She said yes. I asked her, “How late do you think the Tooth Fairy will be this time?”

Willow said, “Oh, about 20 days.” (!)

I said, “Well, remember what she said about your room being clean?”

Willow grimaced, and said, “Yeah. I’ll clean it tomorrow!”

I am soooo evil!

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